Perfume Games


Post by Val the Cookie Queen


Perfume Games


It is exactly a year now since I met Portia.

Coromandel CHANEL Val and portia vienna 2013 Val and Portia Mozart Cafe Vienna 2013

This perfume world is absolutely crazy, fun, rewarding, uplifting and at times absolutely hilarious.

I have two favourite perfume games. They can be played as solitaire or with multiple players.

Game 1. Are they? / Aren’t they?

As I am out and about in the city, with or without my daughter (non perfume junkie friends don´t play this game)
we like to pick approaching people at random and guess if they are going to walk by in a huge cloud of fragrance,
leaving a trail behind them, a light spritz, nothing, or a bad case of BO. After playing this game for several years it is extremely satisfying to
see just how often I get it right.

Exif_JPEG_PICTUREPhoto Stolen Wikipedia

Game 2. Maybe I know More Than You

(usually played silently and pleasurably in your head, depending how annoying the sales assistant is)

Ever been into a perfumery, department store or wherever and had the sales assistant talk a lot of nonsense?
Freddie from Smelly Thoughts recently told me that the SA in Harrod´s explained Vero Kern´s Onda as a lavender. Need I say more?

So one year on and I am about to meet up with Portia again. We will be in London together.
Harrod´s, be warned.

So APJ lovers and friends, feel free to share any perfume games you play!


31 comments on “Perfume Games

  1. Madeleine says:


    Ha! I play number two all the time and the answer is usually yes. So much so that when an S.A. is advising someone else I butt in..whoops!

    Now I must start number one…sounds like fun! And I’m sure you two had a riot in jealous!

    M xxx

    • cookie queen says:

      Hi Madeleine!

      I guess your fragrant ambassadors are in the air right now winging their way back to you. We skipped Harrod´s because we decided they were not worthy of us. But we had more than a blast. They have left us with great memories and a tinge of sadness. Looking forward to organizing a Global Blog Meet. Bussis. Val xxxxxx

  2. Tara says:

    Ha! Too much fun Val. I love to think of you and your daughter playing the first game and the second is a given in most department stores.

    Congrats on your and Portia’s 1st anniversary!

    • cookie queen says:

      I have recently found out that my son James (Big Jim Turbo Gear, as Portia renamed him) plays game 1 on his own. Hmmmm. Could be genetic? Yeah, it´s been a great year.
      Bussis and see you soon I hope.
      Val xxxxxx

  3. Jillie says:

    I’m joining with Madeleine and feeling jealous that you are meeting up with Portia!

    Love the games. I’ve lost count of SAs who are so thick and try to reel off the most amazingly wrong info.

  4. cookie queen says:

    Hi Jillie! Hahahahahaha. Thick shop assistants. I have been out of England for so long that I had forgotten the wonderful usage of the word “thick”. I shall reincorporate it into my vocabulary immediately. I would be lying if I said the time with Portia was anything other than mind-blowing. Thanks for dropping by. 😉 VtCQ xxxx

  5. SallyM says:

    Ugh No 2 for sure. The most irritating and ridiculous line is how you can crush the molecules of a perfume by rubbing your wrists together. Or the SA who informed me that “no one wears Shalimar anymore.” Yesterday I was restocking my space at the vintage mall and over the other side of the “wall” there were 2 women talking about perfumes they liked etc – it was all I could do not to call out and correct them of some of the gibberish they were spouting…

    • cookie queen says:

      Oh yeah – the crushing molecules one. Which just goes to show that people do not think. If they did …………. Oh really? No one wears Shalimar any more? I like eavesdropping too, I forgot to add that! I was just told in Selfridge´s in London on my recent fragrant adventure that Cuir de Russie Extrait is EXACTLY the same as the EdT, except it lasts longer and does´t come with a spray. This was from the Chanel assistant.
      Hmmmmm. Bussis. Val xxxx

  6. Vanessa says:

    No 2 is a constant cross we have to bear. Saddest thing an SA said to my friend ref where she could find Guerlain perfumes was: ‘Guerlang? That stuff is like *really old*! You could try Savers the chemist, they might have some in their bargain bin?’

    Otherwise I once stealth perfumed my ex when he was asleep in bed with L’Ete en Douce. It seemed like a game at the time…
    Vanessa recently posted…A fishy fumehead encounter, featuring Val the Cookie Queen and Portia Turbot-GearMy Profile

  7. Juvy says:

    Val, I’m guilty of no. 2 as well. I’m pretty awful 😀 I try not to show it, but when an annoying SA is particularly pushy, or rude, or just plain WRONG, I bring out the whoopass.

  8. australianperfumejunkies says:

    Hey Val,
    Missing you from avery F*&^KING plush hotel in Bangkok. Our flight has been grounded and we are spending the day relaxing in 5 star comfort before our flight home. Shitty but could be a whole lot worse. I do wish though that we were home so I could cuddle Jin.
    Michael & Portia xxx

  9. laniersmith says:

    I loved this post. I like to play by myself while shopping. “If you were a perfume you would be…” Here comes No.19! Oh look there is Old Spice and right behind him is is grandson Axe Body Spray.
    laniersmith recently posted…GO TO “L” ~ For the Beguiling Vickie Lester.My Profile

  10. cookie queen says:

    Hey! Good morning from Europe! Thanks so much for this new game tip. I am going to start to play it today. Yaaay! That is right up my alley. I am laughing so hard – but I am such a snotty cow ….. it´s gonna be fun. “Grandson Axe Body Spray, plus shower gel perhaps …” chuckling into my cookie dough. Bussis xxxxxxxx Val <3

  11. Undina says:

    Game #1 is a no-go where I live: most people do not wear any perfumes (on the positive side – no BO either). As to the #2, I don’t expect much from SAs in most places so I never argue with them, no matter how wrong they are but I do smile when I listen to them.
    Undina recently posted…A Postcard from Undina: Rain!My Profile

  12. Ines says:

    Oh, I don’t play any perfume games but now I will. 🙂

    I especially like the one with guessing what approaching people will smell like. Although, here lately, if I guess huge amounts of synthetic musks combined with fruit, I’d be correct most of the time. 😉
    Ines recently posted…Behind timesMy Profile

    • cookie queen says:

      Sadly you probably would be right, BUT do we really want everyone wearing what we wear?? I think not. 😉 Nice to see you Ines. xxxx

  13. poodle says:

    I love those games. Honestly the SA’s I’ve come across have been so pushy and ridiculous I tend to avoid them if I can. I wish I could find one somewhere who knew their stuff but it seems impossible.

  14. cookie queen says:

    Hi Poodle!
    There are people around who do know, but they are never as all round as we are because we all have a serious OCD. Do we not?? I speak of course for myself. 😉

  15. Dionne says:

    I don’t usually play #1, but #2…. oh yeah. Occasionally I’ve run into an SA who actually knows a bit about what they’re talking about, and it’s always such a pleasure. And because I’m outspoken, if they get snarky I can give it right back.

    Two other perfume games I will play are 1) get talking about perfume with the Sephora associate who is making me samples, so that she a) send me home with extras because she likes me and b) I share blog links with her because she’s asked. 2) What perfume will my friend fall in love with that’s in my collection? I’m getting better at this one all the time.

    • cookie queen says:

      Dionne!! Nice to see you. Those are two really nice games, I shall add them to my repertoire. They are very kind ones. Note-to-self Try and be a kinder, gentler person. hahaha. Lots of hugs and love to your family. Val xxxxxx

  16. […] my friend Val, I like to indulge in perfume games. Most weeks, you’ll find me re-doing my top 5 and top 10 […]

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