Saturday Question: Getting Married, What To Do?

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Portia

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Hello Fellow Fumies,

Every Saturday we have a Question, an idea purloined from Olfactoria’s Travels. Everyone gets to chime in with an answer, chat with other responders and it is a fun event each week. Taking sides never means taking offence and everyone keeps it respectful and light, even though we can sometimes trawl the depths.

The idea is you’ll see it on the weekend or chime in through the week. Hopefully you will come back and see if anyone has responded to your comment and you can reply to them.

Over 100 responses I will draw a $10 Surrender To Chance Gift Card.
Over 200 responses I will draw a $20 Surrender To Chance Gift Card.
Comment purposefully on yours or anothers comment & you’ll have a chance, random.org will draw on Friday.

Last Weeks Winner: We did not reach 100 last week. BUMMER!

eMail me at (portia underscore turbo at yahoo dot com dot au) with the eMail you’d like me to send your Gift Card to.

Saturday Question:

Getting Married, What To Do?

You may or may not know that we’ve been having an opinion poll here in Australia about Marriage Equality. Obviously that has put it front and centre of our minds. We have decided in the interests of fiscal responsibility and also because we really like each other, even though he leaves his fricken shoes in every walkway possible making midnight toilet runs a minefield.

So though no one proposed and we are diametrically opposed to shackling each other with a ring it looks like some kind of nuptials are in our future. Hopefully not too distant future to be honest, the whole thing is making me itchy.

I’m so torn about everything to do with it. I’d like to go to a registry with our besties and do it really quietly. No fuss, just two guys making a physical, emotional and financial commitment to each other in front of the law and our BFFs. Then the four of us could go have dinner and that would be the end of it.

OR, because we have so many wonderful mates we could spend all the money on a fab fully lit party

OR, we could do a service, have Jin’s parents come to Australia, make it solemn and beautiful. Full reception and gala afterwards.

OR, we could hire a hall and have everything happen at once. Marriage and party in one. Buffet catered, Bar, Disco. The works.

OR, we could go to South Korea and tell anyone who wants to come dates and venue. That way Jin’s parents get involved without the hassle of travel and anyone else that has the time and resources can get themselves there.

OR, we could go to another country, anywhere that does Same Sex Marriages. Again anyone that has the time and resources can get themselves there.

OR, we could do it on a cruise.

There are SO MANY OPTIONS!! Help me please. What did you do or see done that really worked. Doesn’t have to be extravagant. Also it could be just one part of a wedding that you loved that we might incorporate. H E L P

Flickr

My Saturday Question to you is:

Getting Married, What To Do?

 

 

Saturday Question: Do You Budget?

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Portia

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Hello Fellow Fumies,

Every Saturday we have a Question, an idea purloined from Olfactoria’s Travels. Everyone gets to chime in with an answer, chat with other responders and it is a fun event each week. Taking sides never means taking offence and everyone keeps it respectful and light, even though we can sometimes trawl the depths.

The idea is you’ll see it on the weekend or chime in through the week. Hopefully you will come back and see if anyone has responded to your comment and you can reply to them.

I’m currently away on holidays in India and will have limited internet but be assured that I’ll read every comment and answer when I can.

Saturday Question: Do You Budget?

Something I always tell the newbies to the perfumed rabbit hole is to set a budget. This addiction is expensive and ultimately frivolous. Here Warren Buffett puts many of my Dads lectures into a very simple sentence.

If you buy things you do not need, soon you will have to sell things you need.” — Warren Buffett

It’s very easy to get carried away with our hobby and especially so with the way the market has become in aspirational pricing. Is that 50ml bottle of whatever REALLY worth $400? No, of course not but we are so crazy in love that the sensible part of our brain goes of holiday. Most of the time I know exactly how much work goes into earning $400 and respectfully weigh the spend but somehow with fragrance I have a good sense bypass.

I’m looking for advice today on how you keep your spending reined in.

Saturday Question Do You Budget? Images Money FlickrFlickr

My answer to Do You Budget?

Short Answer: No

How I wish I was better at money. I’m terrible at it. Not super terrible but sometimes I reflect on dollars squandered on living a full, fun and fabulous life and my stomach drops.

My parents worked hard all their working lives to make sure my sister and I were fully provided for after they left this mortal coil. Without their legacy I could never live the life I have. So my circumstances aren’t that usual. My basic need of shelter is provided.

I’m also incredibly lucky that my idea to save my own fading career as a showgirl (Turbo Trivia) has become a Sydneywide phenomenon and that we are now employing 8 Drag Queen Contractors including myself. This story would have entirely different outcomes if I had not made a few desperate changes 16 years ago.

So while I’m not rich in any sense of the first world hierarchy, compared to billions of the earths other citizens I am extremely comfortable, and grateful for it.

My Saturday Question to you is:

Do you budget for your perfume consumption? How do you do it? Is there a spend limit weekly or annually? How do you check yourself?

The Difference Between Empathy and Sympathy: 3 Minute Film

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Post by Portia

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Hi there APJ,

Sometimes the world seems to be a pile of shit. Often being thrown into an unhappy memory will trigger a downward spiral for me, and I seem to be most susceptible when I am also overwhelmed with other parts of my life and tired. It feels really selfish to be depressed and that further speeds my downward spiral. Yes, I know I don’t suffer depression in the deepest and blackest pit of hell sense but everything is relative and for me down is down, it’s not a race to the bottom and I don’t need to big note my pain. Sometimes life looks less lovely from inside me.

How You Treat Others

So, taking that into account and knowing that many other people suffer some level of depression then I think it important that we ALL watch this 3 minute lesson in empathy. Some really simple steps to help someone else through the rough times. Nothing feels better than being a light for someone when their world seem dark.

Please watch this,
Portia xx

Brené Brown on Empathy: 3 Minute Film

The Difference Between Empathy and Sympathy

Minimising Stress and Freak-Outs with Scent

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Post by Suzanne R Banks

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Hi there APJ,

If you are feeling stressed, anxious, or unable to cope as well as you usually do, then scent can help you. It is worth noting though, that if you are stressed, it can be really difficult to garner the energy to help yourself – even just a little bit.

Stress Ash Photoholic FlickrPhoto Stolen Flickr

Minimising Stress and Freak-Outs with Scent

In this case I still definitely recommend the use of essential oils, as their healing power is unstoppable, so to invite you to heal yourself, it’s best to use the easy methods which are:

1. Open The Bottle and Take a Huge Whiff

Self explanatory and easy! This may be enough to change your focus (even slightly), and hopefully help you to feel a bit better about things. This method is especially good if you are really freaking out.

2. Put A few Drops Of Oil into the bottom of the Shower

This works in a similar way to just taking a whiff straight from the bottle, but if you’ve got an extra minute, it will give you a completely different experience. Your whole body will be immersed in an essential oil steam. Energetically this will cleanse your aura and have a positive effect on your mind and emotions. Just cover the drain with a cloth or your foot for a couple of minutes, and breathe in the medicinal goodness.

3. Sample

Put a couple of drops onto a scarf, handkerchief or cotton pad and take it with you, or tuck it into your pocket, or your bra. The scent of the oil will help support you through the day, people will comment on how lovely the scent is (then you’ll feel slightly better about life in general), the energetic presence of the oil will bring a sense of calm, and it’s really easy too!

Others Stress SlowTechPhoto Stolen SlowTech

Minimising Stress and Freak-Outs of Others with Scent

If you can help a friend or a partner who is stressing or freaking out, you could employ these methods which are easy for you, but could be monumentally hard for your friend at a time of stress and unrest.Something this simple can help begin the turning around.

1. Nourishing body oil blend

Usually I say “For a coat of your body use 3 teaspoons of carrier oil in a little dish and, add 7 – 8 drops of essential oil. It’s always best to patch test first, before you apply all over.” But you could make this little blend and massage someone’s hands or feet to help them chill out.

***** Always put the drops of essential oil into the bottle or dish first, then add the carrier oil. It gives the scents time to create a synergistic fusion.

For a 50ml bottle of oil add 25 drops and see my articles “Ratios for Blending Essential Oils – A Reminder of the Basics” and “Aromatherapy – It’s Easy as 1 2 3”

2. Scent Their Space

Use 25 drops of oil In a traditional oil burner with a candle, or a diffuser, in your friend’s personal space to help them feel more comfortable. It is easy for you, but could be too much for them at this moment.
A drop of oil can be essential

A drop of oil can be essential

Which oils?

Bergamot – calm, relieve mild anxiety

Chamomile – calming, soothing, medicinal

Cinnamon – sweetness, love what you do for work

Fennel – be kind to yourself

Frankincense – breathe deeply and relax

Geranium – cheery, helps improve downward spiraling moods

Lavender – calm, solidarity and strength

Lemon – gentle, refreshing

Marjoram – grief, emotional pain relief

Rose – Queen of oils to help with all stress issues

Rosewood – flow of love in the heart centre

Vetiver – absolute grounding, cooling to the hot emotions, stops kid’s tantrums

Ylang Ylang – release anger and frustation

 

…. and really, any oil that you love and can help you (or your friend) out.

Good luck.

Best wishes.

PEACE.

Remember to treat yourself first, then everyone will benefit.

Suzanne R Banks xx

Suzanne R Banks Blog
Suzanne R Banks Aromatherapy
Suzanne R Banks FaceBook

(Ed: CONGRATULATIONS to Suzanne whole blog Suzanne R Banks just hit 150,000 views. Nice one my friend. XXX)

copyright suzanne

 

Revelation! My new book out now

Please check out my new book REVELATION! – Reveal Your Destiny with Essential Oils

Amazon USA      Amazon AU      Amazon UK

Tama Blough: A Party for Tama

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Tama Blough Oct 18, 1954 – January 9, 2015

Hiya Australian Perfume Junkies,

Tama Blough, who started SF Sniff –  the San Francisco group who’d come together and sniff fragrances (obviously, sorry) and Managing Editor for CaFleurBon is in trouble. We have a fragrant friend in need, diagnosed with incurable cancer and a desire to stay at home with her cat for as long as possible. Tama is not a wealthy person and needs our help to make this small wish come true.

Already the fragrant community has rallied behind this cause: April Aromatics released a Limited Edition fragrance that sold out in minutes, Nina Zolotow set up a GiveForward campaign to raise the $25,000 needed to pay for health care and living expenses (who will BTW give $25 for every blog written about it to a max of $1000, very freaking cool)

Paul Kiler of PK Perfumes has now created TNT (Tama N Tuberose) and is donating 90 percent of all proceeds to Tama’s fundraiser.
60ml/$150  90 percent ($135)  going directly to a fund managed by Tama’s family.

To buy TNT click here<<JUMP

Do check the original Ca Fleure Bon post about TNT for more information

A Party for Tama

Coming up on the 17th of January are a couple of amazing events in San Fransisco. If you are nearby then you should definitely think about attending.

Private Lunch and Auction: $35 includes Lunch and Auction (more details about Auction nearer the date)

Shopping event & Cocktails: A percentage of all sales will go to Tama from the Tigerlily event.

And Tama, if you get to read this. Best of luck, cuddle the kitty from us at the Australian Perfume Junkies..
Portia & the APJ Crew

Tama Party

Depression: Some Sentences That May Help

Hi there APJ,

We keep coming back to depression because it is a huge problem. Even low level depression can wear you down. There is help, I know it can be hard to ask for it, but there is help all around you. Be careful of you, you are precious, precious and part of the APJ family. HUG!

Depression: Some Sentences That May Help

Depression Vincent_van_Gogh Sorrowing Old Man WikipediaPhoto Stolen Wikipedia

We lost one of Australia’s entertainers on the weekend. I did not know her well. Only a couple of times had we even chatted.

Depression is everywhere and here are a couple of famous people’s little lights that may guide you out, or at least help us to think that we are not alone in depression and that it’s a burden born by many. In these quotes we can see that others can survive depression and create great things, or do great things or use it to power them forward to change the world for good.

Don’t misunderstand me, I am not a world changer. I am doing my best to live a joyous, engaged, wonder-full, harmless life. Surrounding myself with as much positivity and as many positive people as I can, sharing my own energy when and where possible, hopefully bringing light.

I purposely haven’t used these quotes all dressed up and prettified. They are here in black and white so that nothing will distract you from their meanings.
There is hope, you are strong, depression will pass, there is light ahead.

Sending you all love,
Portia xx

“When one door closes another door opens;
but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door,
that we do not see the ones which open for us.”

Alexander Graham Bell, Scottish Scientist and Inventor

 

“When everything seems to be going against you,
remember that the airplane takes off against the wind,
not with it.”

Henry Ford, American Industrialist, Founder of Ford Motor Company

 

“When you come to the end of your rope,
tie a knot and hang on. “

Franklin D. Roosevelt, 32nd President of the United States of America 

 

 

 

Hope for Hope Day – One Seed

We are thrilled to be able to support Australia Hope International with our annual Hope for Hope Day.

On the first Saturday in December, any purchase you make from our online store will directly help the people of Uganda & Congo. We will be donating 100% of profits from all sales made on Saturday December 6th to this valuable work.

Read more here about Hope for Hope Day.

Learn more here about Australia Hope International.

 

Mark the date in your diary, and thanks so much for loving us, and supporting the things that are close to our heart.

xx

Liz Cook

founder