Not All Wrinkles Are Bad

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Post by AF Beauty

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These few weeks I have been traveling, you will be pleased, I hope, to discover I have filled my suitcase with enough goodies to start my own shop, but hopefully it’s not so much that will incur the $300 excess baggage charges….

I have a few items I’m looking forward to reviewing – but this week I’m not writing a review.

Not All Wrinkles Are Bad

Wrinkles London Unsplash PixabayPixabay

I have been here in the mother country with the people I grew up with. Some, quite literally, others I’ve known since Uni. Being here, spending time with them, it is an interesting challenge. I love many of them as though they were my family. We laugh until we cry; we talk of this that happened twenty and thirty years ago. We make plans for the next ten years and predict our futures. At the same time, we mourn deaths of the people in our lives, reminded by the loss of famous stars, already this year David Bowie and Alan Rickman and we are reminded life is short.

But while I’m here with these people, I have left behind my other family in Australia. Not my blood but my choice, people I laugh with until I cry, we talk of what happened, five and ten years ago and fill in the blanks of the other years to twenty and thirty. While I’m away, there have been laughs, deaths and changes that I’ve missed and I feel bereft that I wasn’t there for them in person. There is no substitute for a hand or hug that says more than words over email, text or Skype.

When it comes to beauty and my face, I often wish for the skin and face and condition of my youth. I teeter on the edge of aging, fighting time with a few of my favourite products but I look at furrowed forehead lines and wish for times where I never noticed it. I look at the lines at my cheeks and wonder how my years of laughter as a child has manifested in this?!

Portrait of a man, Delhi IndiaWikiMedia

But I am also thankful. Those lines tell the story of my personal stresses and pain and that of my friends and family. If they could talk, they would tell stories of poorly constructed and unfunny jokes, made funny by being unfunny. They reflect the years of emotion I’ve felt. But in honesty, while I would sometimes with for smooth skin, I would not trade any of those lines for any of my tears or laughter. Each one contributes towards the face I see in the mirror as much as the person behind that.

It used to be more that we would see a life lived in a face wrinkled with time, whereas now we see only age. Isn’t it time we started to see again that not all wrinkles are bad?

Wrinkles discutivo daniel craig omega-da-man FlickrFlickr

Some of the people I admire the most are not fresh faced teenagers but men and women who’s faces tell their story, think Dame Maggie Smith, Dame Judi Dench, Dawn French, Daniel Craig and George Cloony. I wonder if they have taken Botox over tears?!!

How do you feel about your wrinkles? Would you sign up for Botox and fillers, or are you prepared to show them as evidence of your life lived?

19 thoughts on “Not All Wrinkles Are Bad

  1. Portia – such a timely post. I have never had anything done to my face and I’m in my 40’s now. Oh how time flies. However recently I’ve been noticing big changes on it and have thought about botox and fillers. However on the Riviera far too many have gone overboard and in my opinion they look a little freakish. I suppose once you start it’s hard to stop and it becomes an addiction. I’m still holding out but I now say never say never. Like you though I love the faces that are older and have loves and living etched on them. The Daniel Craig’s, Judi Dench, Charlotte Ramplings who look beautiful and untouched. Most of my friends have steered clear so far but the odd one or two have gone for botox and it doesn’t last that long unfortunately. Here you need to see a doctor but in NZ you can pop into your local pharmacy for a quick shot – so I imagine that it’s super popular there now. When I worked there some of my colleagues in their 20’s wanted to start which I thought was rather surprising. Also women in their 40’s feel they need it to secure employment to look younger, particularly if they work in marketing or sales. Anyway I’m sure I’m a bit old fashioned on this and I know that it’s pretty commonplace now. x x x

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    • Hi Megan, I completely agree about the women in the 40’s taking action to secure their employment. I recently met a colleague’s wife for the second time, about a year after first meeting – she is about the same age as me (mumble mumble – starts with 4) and she had changed her hair colour. I commented, not thinking much of it, but she told me she had switched to blonde to help hide greys in her hair as these were considered unfavourably at work. I find most men when asked would say they have no issue with women showing their grey hairs, but I’m not convinced hiring practices reflect that opinion – but that may well be unconscious bias.

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  2. I’m perfectly fine with other peoples wrinkles but seeing them pop up on my face is really bothering me. It makes me feel like my best days are behind me. I’m willing to try all the serums and creams that Sephora sells to fend them off and yes, I would consider fillers too I think. I’ve always been the type of person who only sees the flaws when she looks in the mirror. I try to avoid photos too now. To me my makeup routine is about conceal and correct rather than enhance. Eventually I suppose I’ll have to accept them or just stop looking in the mirror.

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    • Hi Poodle, I am similar, I barely notice other people’s wrinkles but closely see my own. I’m not really sure how I feel about them. Just today, I pulled my forehead to stretch my wrinkles out and sighed at the wrinkles that formed as I dropped it back. I haven’t yet seriously considered botox or fillers, I’m not sure if or when I will.

      I feel sad that you would stop looking in the mirror or at pictures, I hope you find a serum that delays that (and do share with us the one you find that works).

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  3. I am 62 and I don’t have that many wrinkles due to good family “skin genes” but I like the ones I have. No Botox for me. And none of those awful fillers either. They give people chipmunk cheeks and look ridiculous. My son is a physician and he doesn’t think Botox is safe. We have no studies on longterm effects of Botox and it’s injected close to the brain. NOT for me!

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    • Definitely there is skill in application, there are some bad examples for sure, but I guess we don’t notice the good ones because they are so good.

      Safety is another matter…

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  4. Not interested in Botox. I remember going to one of those HD opera broadcasts and finding the fact that Renee Fleming’s forehead didn’t move one tiny bit to be incredibly distracting. But it wasn’t my face up there 20 feet high, so I can’t really fault her her bit of vanity. However, I do have “marionette” lines descending from the corners of my mouth and I really hate them, so I’m thinking about checking out how much fillers would cost. And if I had the money, I’d have blepharoplasty. I have very fleshy eyelids and I’d love to have lovely hollowed eye-sockets like Virginia Woolf. I have taken very good care of my skin for years and years, always wear sunblock, etc etc, so I guess it’s not all that bad. Mustn’t grumble.

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  5. I have noticed more lines showing up and I am ok with that. What bothers me more is that my face is very dry especially in the winter. I change my moisturizing routine to suit the seasons. Needles scare me especially the thought of them on my face – so I will just have to deal with aging gracefully without complaint. Sandra

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  6. No fillers for me – quality beauty products, yes, but my face also tells my story. I’m happy in my life and in my own (60 year old) skin right now – I’ve finally reached a great place to be (wonderful husband, great career, children grown and happy,etc.) Why would I want to freeze the face that’s gotten me to this point?

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  7. Interesting that this appears after a BBC documentary that showed an unlooked for effect that Botox has on the people who use it.

    Neuroscientist Dr David Eagleman presented a research project that had people’s faces wired up whilst they looked at cropped photos of people’s eyes, and they had to choose a word to describe each emotion that was being shown. They found that those test subjects who’d had Botox were less able to read the emotions on other people’s faces or in other people’s eyes.
    The non-Botox group would naturally “mirror” the expressions in the photos, to try and feel the same emotion too, but this “mirroring” isn’t available to the Botox group. The lack of feedback from their own facial muscles meant that the Botox group couldn’t read other people’s expressions and feelings so accurately.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b070ss9x/the-brain-with-david-eagleman-5-why-do-i-need-you
    (See from 15 minutes in to 20 mins, roughly, if you can watch it.)

    I leave my face to its own devices, incidentally!

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    • Fascinating research by the neurologists. My son the doctor was right,it DOES affect the brains of people who use Botox in one way or another. I dont’ even want to think about what that filler crap does to people’s faces. They may wake up one morning with a triple chin-lol. All the filler falls down. That would be pretty funny….

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    • I will check whether this is still available on iplayer, it’s an interesting behaviour and even more interesting that where botox has paralysed the muscle that the emotion is not empathised as well.

      thank you

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